PROS OF COMPETING
- Reach my fitness goals
- Conquer my fear of getting on stage
- Lose weight
- Gain muscle and strength
- Resume builder for a career in the fitness industry
- Build stronger relationships
- Be part of a team
- Boost my self-confidence
- Look better in my clothing
- Feel better on a day to day basis
- Inspire others
- Look DAMN good in a bikini (which, lets be honest ladies...that is SUPER important when the sun actually shines in the PacNW)
- Fear of failure
- Issues with my eating disorder may surface again
- Fear people may tell me I am not good enough, lean enough, strong enough...etc. (More self-esteem issues)
- Not reach my full potential in the 5 month period and be told that I am not ready to get on stage
This is what I have to say to that voice, "This is my life. I am strong, determined, beautiful, and most important I have friends and family that love and support me. So **** (you can fill in the profanity here...keeping it PG rated) OFF little green man. I am doing this competition and I WILL SUCCEED!"
And now it finally makes sense what the title of my blog should be. Before I borrowed the title from a clothing company, but after coming to the realization of what is truly holding me back, I have settled on "Future Competitor: From Binging to Bikini"
I will get more into the eating disorder as I continue to blog, but for right now...just know that I am in the recovery process. I was diagnosed with an eating disorder last year with an emphasis on binging. I have been MUCH better lately and with the help of an Eating Disorder Specialist, I have found a good balance in my life. So now, I am challenging myself and that little green man in my head as I work toward my fitness goals.
143 days left
2-3 lbs per week
lose 10 % body fat (my personal goal...I am sure my trainer would like lots more!)